- Behavior
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- Parenting
Facing third grade? How to help with that challenging year
Don’t be surprised by the biggest change in elementary school: third grade.
That's when children may feel anxiety from the academic pressure of testing, say Deborah Newell, program director of Positive Parenting Program, known as Triple P, at Community Partners of South Florida, and Terri Mortensen, a clinical psychologist working in South Florida. “There is a huge leap in academic standards," Newell says. "The need for reading comprehension goes up, and in math, there is a huge increase in abstract thinking,” she says. “And the writing requirements become larger.”
As if that weren’t enough, your child may change emotionally and socially too, Newell says.
“They are starting to exhibit young adult socialization,” Newell says. “They are not quite as close to their parents. They are more concerned with what their peers are thinking. This can be unnerving. Parents say, ‘What happened to my cute little second-grader?’ ”
Your best skills during this time: Watch your children, talk to them, act quickly when they change and support their independence. These skills, with a few adjustments for age, should serve you well until graduation, Newell says.
It takes patience and persistence to pry information from a child, Mortensen says. Ask your child specific questions on the ride home or while preparing meals. “You might ask, ‘Who did you sit with at lunch? Or, did anything funny happen today?’ ” she says. You also can ask about your child’s favorite activities, such as arts or music, rather than just academics.
It’s hard not to judge your child, so you must hear them out when they feel like talking, even if you don’t like what you hear. “They will come to you if they don’t feel they’re going to be judged or punished,” Mortensen says.
SOURCES:
• Terri Mortensen, a clinical psychologist in South Florida and former Child and Family program manager, Faulk Center for Counseling
• Deborah Newell, Triple P program director, Community Partners of South Florida
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